The best and worst musical instruments: a list

Worst
1. The acoustic guitar
2. Fretless bass
3. Sitar
4. Children’s choirs
5. Paul McCartney chewing vegetables for percussion
6. Feedback
7. Simmons drums
8. The voice of Mariah Carey
9. Flying V guitar
10. Side of pork which Scott Walker punches for percussion on The Drift

Best
1. The vocoder
2. Double bass
3. Glass harmonica
4. Mellotron
5. Sousaphone, as played by John Simon with the Band
6. The Pet Sounds box of fun
7. The voice of Björk
8. The Flaming Lips’ boombox orchestra
9. Roland TB-303 bassline
10. The melodica

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5 thoughts on “The best and worst musical instruments: a list

  1. Some things that are clearly missing from the list:

    The carillion
    The kazoo
    The calliope
    The theremin
    The chainsaw that the lead singer of Jackyl plays.

    I have no idea on which list any of the above belong.

  2. I’m SOOOOOO sick of acoustic guitar. It’s 2007, get some electricity.

    My most hated and loved instrument is the Synthesizer. I want one so badly, but so much shit has come from it.

    New loved instrument: Laptop. Martine wants me to open for the Square Waves, so I have to get my shit together and work out some live love for everyone.

  3. Haha, uhh, you’re all wrong. Trumpet is obviously the best instrument ever invented. People have loved and played the trumpet since Roman Times, and they still love it now. So get your heads screwed on straight till you recognize that a trumpet is the best instrument in the world (BTW, who the fuck wrote this list? What are you, a moron?)

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